Back in The Saddle. Almost.

I have successfully made it through one of the busiest holiday seasons of my entire life. Mostly, lol. I hate waiting so long in between updates.. but I just didn't have the opportunity to write about all things we've been up to the last month.

It was supposed to be a big month for Dave, but it turned out not to be at all. We arrived for our pulmonology appointment three weeks ago, only to find that a clerical error had us there two days too late. They were pretty annoyed with our blatant inability to show up when we were scheduled, until I handed them the office printed letter with the incorrect appointment listed. As it turns out though, we made a wasted trip to the city, because the good doctor wasn't even in on Fridays, so we couldn't have seen him even if they could have found the time.

We agreed to let them have the doctor call us for the official results of Dave's sleep apnea study. I didn't want a phone call, because it's so detached and impersonal, and I never feel that I can ask the questions that Dave and I both have, over the phone. So far, it's turned out not to matter, because it's been three weeks, and we've still not heard from him. It infuriates me to no end when they look us in the eye and promise to call, and then.. let us slip through the cracks. We're just another file to them. I miss the days where people gave a darn about the people behind the account number.

Dave is unconcerned about the entire thing, because he's stubbornly got it in his head that there isn't a thing wrong with him, and he doesn't need them to tell him so. I'm a little less easily convinced though, and as soon I simmer enough to give them a polite inquiry.. I'll find out some answers for everyone concerned.

We were supposed to have Dave's over-the-road driver's test two weeks ago, Thursday. Ironically enough, we had one heck of an ice storm the night before. We peered out the window wearily that morning, but we weren't left to fret for long. The DMV gave us a call and a bit of a head's up. Apparently, Dave only had to slide on the ice once for an automatic, no exceptions failing, and they encouraged us to assess accordingly, and make an educated decision with the information at hand.

Dave was impatient and wanted it over with, but we both knew there was too much at risk to chance it. I begged Dave to reschedule, and he agreed it was for the best. Unfortunately, the small town local DMV has been closed for the past two weeks, for the holidays, and Dave's new driving test has been moved to January the eighth. I know I've already asked everyone to send good positive energy Dave's way when it was supposed to be LAST month, but if anyone has any left.. he could probably use it again for this Thursday.

T-10 days and counting until Dave and I fly to Toronto to see his mother, cousins.. and best friends from a distant past life. I'm excited about it, but my nervousness is taking rank. Arranging flights, arrivals, departures, layovers, careful timing and making connections, finding a hotel, and getting everywhere on time, and making sure there's enough time in between layovers to allow Dave ample time to walk to a far off gate destination, and everything else that a trip entails ..always pushes me into stressful zones of happy fun time. Dave and I used to plan everything down to the letter together, but now it's usually left up to me to make sure things run smoothly, and the pressure gets to me. Dave used to drive our little economy rental car everywhere we needed to be in a city of over seven million, but now, even if he passes his over-the-road test this week, he's still not going to have the rapid reflexes for huge city driving. Taxis are another level of stress all together, and I'm just not sure I'm looking forward to the responsibility. I'm trying not to let it get to me. I'm hoping we can have a nice visit, and a nice time, and see old faces that we've missed, and just.. enjoy ourselves, but I usually think, worry, stress and obsess far too much to ever allow that to happen, lol.

I've been in and out of the dentist several times the last month. For weeks and weeks I hunkered down and tried to settle into a life with consistent dental pain. I had all but stopped chewing on the left side of my mouth, because despite having root canals and crowns done months ago, the gums were still so painful. It wasn't anywhere near the pain I was experiencing before the root canals, of course.. but it still seemed to hurt so much more than it should have. When they just wouldn't get any better, I called and made an appointment to go in for a check-up. Dr.S asked me what was going on, and took a look, and agreed with me. Something wasn't quite right. It turns out that one of the crowns they put on was a little bit too small, and the sizing error made it loose, creating a food trap, among other things. The real trouble was the extra wide gap in between the two teeth, which allowed every bite to shoot upward and hit the gums in between, keeping them raw and unable to heal. There was only one fix.. I would need to replace the crown.

Permanent crowns, by their very nature.. were never designed to come back off on purpose. Despite mine being a little bit loose, that didn't mean it was going down without a fight. I went in a week ago today to have the permanent taken off, and my face is still aching from the beating I took. The crown literally had to be knocked off, and the pounding, and drilling mess that ensued wasn't enjoyable, to say the least. After an hour, it finally came off, and a new temporary was made. We took new molds, and ordered the new crown, and I have to wait another FOUR weeks before my new and improved permanent crown will be in. I was a little upset that it was going to take so long. I really didn't want to have to leave the country with a temporary crown. They gave me an emergency kit, with glue and cement and the whole nine yards in case I'm six hundred miles, and an entire country away from the office when, with knowing my luck.. it inevitably falls off, lol.

I've felt like a ninety-year-old woman the last few weeks. I seemed to have taken on one too many holiday projects for the family this year, and pushed my body a little passed it's comfort zone. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed every minute of every ounce of effort put in to making my family smile this year, but the wear and tear on my hands, shoulders and back are still with me weeks after the blissful event.

Since October, I've been painting minuscule little details on ceramic and plaster Christmas ornaments. A very long story short, hand painted ornaments were a family tradition of my Gram's before she died. I grew up cherishing them, and somewhere over the years, I've picked it up myself. Last year, the family was crushed that I wasn't doing them, but I just wasn't to a place in Dave's recovery where I had the time for them. To be honest, I wasn't going to do them this year either, but after the pleading looks of my aunts for months, I broke down and bought the supplies and got busy. I've been painting for three very long months, but wasn't able to say anything, since I was bound and determined to keep it a surprise until they opened them. Despite random familial disturbances and interruptions, I think this years ornaments were some of my best, and I was very proud of them. I finished a mere five days before Christmas, and really took it to the wire this year. I'm still kicking myself for not finding the time, and just plain forgetting to take pictures of all of them before I gave them all away. I managed to get a picture of my mom's and sisters ornaments though, to share with you, so you can at least get an idea of what's kept me so busy the last few months.

Painting them all once is one thing, but ceramics needs at LEAST three coats before it's good enough for me.

I'm bummed that only the snowmen are featured. There were Santa's, and Penguins, and Reindeer too!

I've literally been painting every single day, around the clock, and often until five and six in the morning to make sure I got them all done in time. With a continuously growing family, I had nineteen of them to paint this year. I used to be able to paint a few for friends, neighbors and other loved ones too, but any more, as the family gets bigger, it's all I can do just to paint for them. My fingers have been twitching and cramping for months, lol.. my shoulders constantly ache, and somehow, I've managed to pinch a nerve at the base of my spine in the process, the latter of which had me back in to see my doctor last week. Other than super-alieve, there isn't much that will fix me though, other than rest.. and time.

I never realized how many traditions our family has around the holidays, until I participated in just about all of them this year. Every year, someone in our family has to go on a scavenger hunt. It began decades ago, and solely for people who were newly married in to our family, or at least about to be. We're not always blessed to have someone new join us though, so for the years in between, someone from our family is put to the test. This year, we put mom to the challenge, and sent her off for clues to a special letter from me thanking her for all she's done for Dave and I this year, as well as a gift from the heart, the best kind. I had them a family portrait knit blanket made this year, and I think they really loved it.

Wayne thinks he looks weird, and Sassy says I didn't get her best side. Dinky thinks he looks too chubby, but they're not fooling me any, they all look great, I think, =) lol.

Aside from the ornaments, I decided to do a family slide-show presentation at the very last minute, as a special gift for my family. I started just six nights before Christmas. I always say I do my best work under intense pressure, but I really wish I wouldn't put it to the test all the time. Once I set my mind to doing it, it took on a life of it's own, and grew so much bigger than I ever expected it to. I texted my cousin Stephenie at midnight one night, begging for her help, and my new assistant she became. As we planned, Mom was incorporated as extreme photo scanner and label making pro, and without either of them, I am certain I would have failed miserably. For six days and five nights I ate, slept and dreamt pictures, and by the time I was finished, the monster spanned nine decades of our family, and our history. Set to an infectious instrumental loop of "Against All Odds," and classic black and gray signature swirls and matching text.. it was amazing. In the back of my mind, I was certain that no one was going to sit still and watch over four hundred and fifty pictures scroll through, for almost thirty-four minutes of slide-show dullness, and my efforts would have been wasted, but I was pleasantly elated. Everyone, right down to the littlest ones.. seemed to be delighted in every single picture, and forgoed even presents and food to sit and watch themselves on TV, and laugh at the bad seventies furniture, the horrid eighties mullets, and the hilarious fashion spanning the decades. I titled it, "Counting Our Blessings," and I think it was a really great reminder that, even when we're all broke, and down on our luck, the real gifts of the holidays.. are each and every smiling face around the Christmas tree, and not what's underneath it.

A couple random favorite pictures from our family dinner this year:

Dave got a new hat, more in jest, than anything, but he loves it, heh.

And even Santa came to visit, (while I haaate this pictures of myself, no one else would hold him up for me, so I was desperate, lol). This is Bentley, my cousin's Yorkie.

I never did get around to making a new video of Dave speaking with his brand new mouthpiece in. I'm so sorry about that. The last couple weeks have been challenging, as Dave valiantly tries to adjust to having something foreign in his mouth all the time. At first, it really was quite terrible, and he lisped and slurred over every word, and our minds reeled as we took a major hit in the recovery with such a setback. The last three weeks of speech therapy, we've all been working double-time, since we're running out of time to make it count. Dave's made some pretty great strides to adjust, and is working harder than ever to over-enunciate every word and accommodate for the discomfort. It's funny, because we went through this ordeal, just to make it easier for Dave to talk, and.. it IS easier for his breath support, and less effort to get his air out and into his speech, but now he's had to double up on the enunciation process. We weren't expecting that.

Elaine says it's fascinating to her, because even she wouldn't have guessed that we would have to digress to progress. She says that this developement would make a great case study, and I laugh and tell her that he would have made a great study from the very beginning in every facet of his healing. Nothing about our journey has been typical, so I don't imagine we'd start now. She says he talks a thousand percent better now, than he did when he first got the palatal lift device, and that he talks a million percent better than he does without the mouthpiece in. Several people have said similar things, that it's like night and day with and without it. Everyone raves that the improvement is so astounding. Dave and I just gawk at them, unsure what to say. It's comical really, that we're just too close to every day with us to be able to tell a difference either way. Me especially, because whether Dave is awake, or sleepy, or energetic or worn down, day or night, and everything in between, I'm who he talks to, and I just hear Dave, good, bad or otherwise. The subtle nuances of his speech variances blur for the two of us. We're just waiting for the day when we take time to stop and take notice, that Dave talks like he used too again. That may, or may not ever happen, but until or unless it does, we're just living life, and getting through our days, still, always.. one day at a time.

I could go on and on about my thoughts and feelings on recovery before and after the addition of a three thousand dollar piece of wire and plastic in Dave's mouth, lol.. but I think it would be best heard from the man himself. Dave knows even better than I do, how he feels, and what he thinks about how this piece helps him or hurts him, so.. I think I'll let him tell you a little bit about it himself.

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I thought it was too late to take that comparison video of Dave, with and without his speech appliance, but you know what, maybe it's not. It might make an interesting test to see if his regular followers can tell any positive, (or negative) differences in his speech effects. So, I really do promise to try and get that together for you all soon, and ..anyone interested can let us know what you think.

Thank You all for joining us again this month, and thank you all for your understanding in my lengthy updating delays this time around. December was disturbingly busy for me, with my holiday crafting constraints and deadlines, but I don't expect to be so busy from here on out, (our trip to Canada next week, not-withstanding, of course), but hopefully I can get around to updates a little quicker. I hope that everyone had wonderful holiday togetherness over Christmas, and that the New Year brings you all the success and prosperity you've been hoping for. Thank You for your continued love, concern, and support, for Dave and I, and his ongoing recovery, and until next time, Much Love, Many Hugs, and Good Night to You All.