Hustle and Bustle, and Around We Go..

It's been quite a busy time around here the last week or two. Mom and Dave and I started the week shopping for local needy kids. Every year, mom's motorcycle education and charity group collects money to give some special kids a special Christmas. For some reason, when it's time to shop, everyone is busy. This works for us though, because Mom and I really enjoy it. We spent all day last Wednesday spending a thousand dollars on over a hundred toys for the kids this year. I can still see the look of relief and joy on the pastor's face when we dropped off bags and bags of toys at that church. It's always a great feeling when you know you made a small difference in the life of a child. Many children!

Later that night we had the group's holiday party. It was so nice to be invited. The director said that Dave and I HAD to come, because we honestly and truly help with more of their events than the actual members, and sadly, he's right. They all love to go on the rides, and excursions, as all Harley and Victory, and Honda folks are apt to do, but when it comes to shopping for needy kids, or stuffing seven thousand Easter eggs, or cleaning up the mess when the party is over, watch them run, lol.

Everyone kept staring at Dave half the night. I used to hate the eyes all glaring at us. First at Dave, and then at me, and then at Dave again. I used to volunteer explanation, but I just smile politely and finish my dinner now. I assume the supremely curious will ask, and the ones lacking the courage will move along. In turn, my mother absolutely delights in telling anyone who'll listen what happened, and where we've been the last two years. Suddenly, Dave is the star of the party, and everyone is amazed by his progress. I just continue eating my dinner, and smile. I was a little knocked over though at the end of the party, when I was helping the officers clear the trash and leftovers away after most everyone else had left. This lovely older lady walked up to me and put her arm under my elbow like she had known me all my life. She says to me.. "You know.. we've all been asking Dave how he is all night, but.. How are You, Honey? I'm sure this has all been just as hard for you, if not harder." I'm not sure how long my mouth hung open as I looked at her dumbfounded, but it was at least long enough for me to feel a little silly. I didn't have an answer ready like Dave always does because I never need one. I don't try to evoke pity when I say that no one ever asks.. that's just the way it is. I don't even mind anymore. Eventually I just smiled an enormous smile and told her I was great.. which, is the same thing I would have said whether it was the absolute truth, or a complete and utter lie. The truth varies, but the answer is always the same, both before Dave's accident, and most especially after it.

The family sat down to watch It's A Wonderful Life a few nights ago. I've seen that movie just about every year of my life so far, and some years.. twice, but this time around it meant a little more to me. The beginning starts off with a shot of the night's sky, and there are three angels having a conversation. Having just heard snippets of several dozen prayers going heavenward to try and save a man named George Bailey, the angels are a little overwhelmed by the interest in this one man, and decide they better send an angel down to help. I got a little misty-eyed thinking that surely this must have been the same scene as, literally, hundreds of people from all over the world sent prayers up for Dave in the days following his accident. If I had ever doubted the power of prayer.. I don't anymore. It's A Wonderful Life is such a feel good movie anyway, but now I think I love it just a little bit more.

Speaking of "feel-good." There is no reason for posting this other than pride and adoration, but two months ago, I became an aunt again, for the third time, and I just had to share pictures of my newest little niece, Kya. Isn't she precious? It's times like this that I really wish I didn't live so far away from so many of the ones I love. I can't wait to meet her.

Such a little doll-baby.

Little Miss Kya.

It's taken a little time, and quite a lot of butting heads with the trust committee, but our trip to Toronto in January has finally been approved for Dave AND his wife. We're leaving his caregiver at home, lol. I should be able to schedule the flights by the end of next week, if all goes well. Dave's been practicing his driving here and there around town, and while he's still a little stiff, he is much improved. He felt ready to schedule his driving appointment, so I gave the local DMV a call yesterday, and his big driving test is December 18th. While seemingly a small privilege to many, or at least a perk that everybody takes for granted.. driving means a great deal to Dave. It always has.

In the back of my mind, I have this nagging worry that for some horrible reason, the local DMV will decide to fail him based off his movement, his walking, and his speech, and choose to not see his driving for what it is. I see people dismiss him every day when he's not done anything more than given them a polite hello. It's really tough to justify going in for this exam as it is, because technically, no one has ever told him he's not allowed to drive. It was only mentioned in passing at the hospital while Dave was in rehab, and a couple times by Elaine, his speech therapist since then, but it's not like the police showed up at Dave's bedside and took his license and told him not to drive until he's been re-tested. For all intents and purposes, his driver's license is still perfectly valid. Dave and I have always wanted to do everything by the book, and the right way, our entire lives.. and I hope that doesn't mess everything up for him, and cost him the privilege and the right to drive a car. Keep him in your thoughts this month, as we try to get him back a little of the independence he's lost, if you could.

Last Saturday was a busy day of initial Christmas shopping, and errand running. I stopped by to get a couple pictures printed at the one hour photo center in Wal-Mart, but the machine was acting up, and the clerk was helping me. She raised her eyebrows a little when she was flipping through my photos, and I got a little nervous. You never know what a stranger might think about the stuff you thought was worth taking pictures of. She said "Wow, are you a photographer? Like, a professional one?" I laughed. No way, Why? "You take amazing pictures.. some of the best I've seen come through here." I was pretty flattered, and went home with ideas of grandeur, thinking I was going to turn my life into one of a professional photographer. I snapped out of it a little while later, lol. It's always nice to hear a compliment though.

Saturday night, the church had their live nativity display. Dave and I signed up to help again. We don't dress the part, but we can pass out candy-canes, and Happy Birthday, Jesus pencils like nobodies business. It was bitterly cold again for the second year in a row. There was a roaring bonfire, and a free hot chocolate stand, but we weren't close enough to take advantage of them. That's okay though. We were perfectly content to keep Pastor company, with his new little friends.. Bailey, the miniature herpferd, and Sheepie.. the... sheep. Well, what she lacked in name originality, she more than made up for with her appetite for my hair, lol. Dave and I had a good time, but it's always a disappointment when we hardly see ANY of our congregation there. I guess it's just too cold to see most people come out. The kids and grandparents, and Buddy, the local stray dog really enjoyed it though. Here were a couple of my favorite photos from the event: (Pastor Keith even used them on his slideshow at church last Sunday. We were celebrities for a day)!

He.. or she.. had quite a little cow attitude. (And that's Pastor too).

My little cousin Zeb was Joseph, and Sheepie the sheep.

Mary, Joseph, baby Jesus, and Angel.. and Buddy, the stray!

And a very cold me.. trying to hold gifts in frozen figners...

I always like to jot down funny stories to give everyone a little glimpse into life after brain injury. Too many times, you can only find the sad ones. Dave loves to try and do every day little things for me, since he can't do everything he used to be able to do. He asked me if I needed anything to drink, and despite not really being thirsty, I always say I would love anything be brought me. He announced that he was going to bring me some tea, and ventured off to get it for me. The kitchen is right on the other side of our bedroom wall, and the walls are thin enough for me to listen as he rummages around in there, getting distracted by all it's wares. Twenty minutes later he comes back into the bedroom, and stands beside me, hovering, watching me play a game. I pause, and look at him and smile, and say "Thanks Honey!" He looks at me quite blankly and asks me what I'm thanking him for. I wave my hand in front of the empty desk in front of me, and say.. "For my tea, of course!" He looks and smiles and says you're welcome, and.. slowly it dawns on him, that, he never brought anything back with him from the kitchen, and that he complaetely forgot that he went in there for anything to begin with. He laughs, and holds up a finger, and heads back to the kitchen to try again. Usually, but not always.. he'll bring something back with him this time, but not always what he originally promised. It happens every day. It definitely keeps things.. interesting, lol.

The big event of the month around here has definitely been our trek to the capital city (of Indiana, lol), to get Dave's speech appliance from Dr. Lalonde last Thursday. It's been ten months in the making to get to this stage in our little adventure, and we were full of pinned down hopes and expectations. Dr. Lalonde was so proud of his handy work. We got Dave fitted, but it was soon off to the hospital across the street. Dave had to get another nasaloscopy done to make sure the lift appliance was pressing up on all the right places of the pallet, and we needed a specialist of another kind to help with that.

We spent almost an hour with Dr. Lalonde, and Donna. We poked and prodded, puzzled over Dave's new speech, and continued to prod some more. Dr. Lalonde bustled off to shave down sides and parts of the lift device four different times, before he was satisfied with it, and Donna called in some three of her peers to puzzle it over with us too. Nobody wanted to say out loud that Dave sounded much better withOUT the device in.. especially Dr. Lalonde who'd just spent a month artistically crafting it. Donna even called up Angela Dickson, the woman who had referred Dave to get the procedure done in the first place, and we let Dave talk on the phone with her for awhile and she studied him too.

The piece does indeed do what it was intended for. It presses Dave's palette up, and seals off his airway that doesn't close properly since the accident. It does stop the leakage of air from out his nose when he speaks, and it does reduce the nasal sound of Dave's speech when he talks. Unfortunately, it also makes him sound like Sean Connery with a lisp.. lol. Everyone was unanimous in the conclusion that Dave didn't need the prosthesis, even Dr. Lalonde, and we all joked that we could put the lift on a gold plated chain and give it a spinner, and it would be all the rage in fashion by this time next year. Unfortunately, I was well aware that Elaine would want to work it and milk it for all it's worth, and since it took ten months, and three thousand dollars to get this far, she won't be giving up on it any time soon.

We headed to speech therapy yesterday for the first time in three weeks. It was a weird routine to get back into, for Dave and I both, I'm afraid. We stressed to Elaine that three specialists, as well as Dave and I, believed he didn't need it. We tried to explain to her that most of us were in agreement that Dave was diagnosed so long ago for the lift, and that he's so much improved in his speech since then, that he no longer needed the piece. Elaine was so focused on the disappearance of the nasal friction, (or soft snorting sound every time he makes consonant sounds), that everything else, including the lisp, went by the wayside. I actually had to point out the drawbacks to her before she even noticed them, and then got all dramatic about how badly Dave was enunciating with the piece in his mouth. Right, I said.. it's because he has a piece of resin and several wires in his mouth, and it changes everything he's worked on the last year. My explanation wasn't good enough for her. She gave us an illustration how young children with orthodontia can compensate within a week of having something new to work around in their mouths. She agreed that it would be much different for Dave, who wouldn't be able to adapt with anywhere near that kind of speed.

We have five visits left with her, approved by insurance, and Elaine aims to use every bit of those five weeks trying to get Dave adjusted to having spare parts crammed in his mouth. She said she could always request more visits if she thought he really needed them, and Dave and I both groaned audibly. Speech therapy is fantastic, but now that we'll be paying out of pocket for every penny of what insurance doesn't cover in the end.. it's much less desirable now, (especially at a hundred bucks a pop). We'll muddle through somehow though. Somehow.. we always do.

I have to admit though, it was bitter-sweet to say goodbye to Dr. Lalonde. He was so cute, thinking up reasons to spend time with us, and walk us to our car, and give me a hug. He was flustered and repeating himself a bit as he said his goodbyes, knowing it was the last time he'd likely be seeing us. With the piece made, and the dental work accomplished, we don't need him anymore, but after a dozen visits over half a dozen months, we've grown kind of fond of him. He implored me to call him if I needed anything at all, or had any questions. We both knew I wouldn't call, which probably made it that much more difficult on him. It's weird who you can get attached to in an adventure like the one that Dave and I travel. He was just.. such a nice, nice guy. (And he's totally going to miss my amazing assistant's skills, I can promise him that, lol).

Dave's Palatal Lift "Appliance!"

Dave, and The Good Dr.

And, Dr. Jim, and I.. for no other reason than he insisted. (It.was.SO.cold).

My last big hurrah was spending eight hours the other night constructing Mom's Christmas tree, and the winter holiday village underneath it. It's another tradition in our family. Both of my aunts, my mother and I, and my Gram before us.. have all had them. They've almost come to be expected around here, so we keep doing it. Mom got new carpet this month, and limited me to HALF of our village this year. It was so hard for me to pick my favorite half, but somehow I managed, lol. At least with only putting up half of everything, it only took me eight hours, and not the better part of seventeen to finish it. I took a couple pictures to share with anyone who might be interested in seeing it, (the entire thing, and a couple close ups, just for fun).

For all your ice rink skating needs!

Down on the Farm.

My train chug-chug-chugging out of the mountain tunnel, =) lol.

Even with only half of it there.. it's pretty monumental, to me.

That concludes the highlights reel, at least since the last update anyway. My apologies that it's a little long this time around. I kept meaning to write an update before this busy week, but.. it's been a busy week, lol. Thank You, to all of you, as always.. for your continued interest in Dave's progress. I'll try to get a new video up soon, so you can check out how Dave sounds with his new mouthpiece in, and so you can hear just how much work we have ahead of us. Until next time, Much Love, Many Hugs, and Good Night to You All.